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words from the heart
 Tuesday, February 24, 2009  9:14 PM 
Why does it feel like I'm so alone sometimes? Maybe because I keep thinking too much nowadays. I'm scared I'm losing some of the people I love, and hold dear to my heart. I'm sometimes ashamed of my thoughts, because I can't believe I thought them, but I can't help it. Maybe it's because I'm jealous. Maybe it's because of the way they present themselves. I don't know, but I miss having the closeness, with that one person.
Maybe too many people take too many things for granted. Having watched "Invisible Children", my problems suddenly seem so insignificant. I'm so much better off than those poor souls, yet I still complain? How dare I complain? So why do they still pain me? Why does it still hurt?
Why does it feel like I'm screaming at the top of my lungs, and not a single soul can hear me, and not a single soul cares? Why do I feel the way I feel? Why is it, that I suddenly think certain people seem fake, or that certain people are so into themselves that they can't even see the rest of us? Why? And why won't this feeling go away?
You want to know what's unfair? I'll tell you what's unfair. Unfair is the fact that because I've made mistakes, you can't let it go. You use it to hang over my head, thus won't let me to do anything. It's unfair, because I want to be given a chance. It's unfair because everyone else who is like me, is given it, but I'm not.
I just want to be free...
xoxo
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